Middle of Nowhere

I live in the middle of nowhere. Seriously my zip code is 4 numbers and then a question mark.

Middle of Nowhere

I live in the middle of nowhere. Seriously my zip code is 4 numbers and then a question mark.

Comments

Comments can be posted anonymously now, so let me know what you really think!


Also, I'm gonna start writing again soon, i'm just super busy.

and by "super busy" i mean "chronic masturbator"

Beyonce

I want to write a response song to Beyonce's "If I Were A Boy." I'd probably call it, "If I Were A Girl, (I'd Probably Complain About That Too.") Yes the parentheses are necessary, if a song is going to be a hit apparently it needs a subtitle.

Auto Charades

NT

Blu-Ray 2

rewrite eventually...

I'm a big fan of the Blu-Ray discs because I'm the only person I know with a actual Blu-Ray player, so that means that any person that wants to watch a Blu-Ray disc has to come to me and hang out with me, If that extra ten dollars means someone will spend 2 hours with me, i'll pay it. Yeah, I'm that sad.

Laws

I hate how every state has some bullshit laws that are somehow important to uphold, like in Ohio you can't mow your lawn on Sundays without a shirt, or in Alaska you can't feed a moose alcoholic beverages, but some laws make no sense to me like why is it illegal for me to kill my neighbor's dog and seriously injure their 6-year-old son just because I was drinking.

Video Games 2

A lot of people say video games are "too real." pointing to examples like Grand Theft Auto and others in that genre. Well, yeah.. but what about those games that are too unreal? Like Dance, Dance, Revolution. Never have I gone to a club and heard "Everytime I Touch" seen people dancing like "Up, Down, Left, Right Right, Down, Up Down Up Down SIDES!

Updated First Joke

I wish every stripper was named Charity, that way I wouldn't be lying on my taxes when I write off thousands to charity.

Blu-Ray

People wonder why Blu-Rays haven't been successful mainstream. I don't find it that shocking it's an extra ten bucks to see a better picture. Personally I don't see how the better picture makes Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector a better movie. In fact, I can see it being a lot worse.

T9Word

I hate T9word. For those of you that don't know what that is, it's a program on your cell phone that guesses what you are trying to type to make it "easier." Is it "easier" for me now that my girlfriend won't let me go near her puppy? No! In fact, maybe T9Word should learn when I'm trying to text fuck my girlfriend.

Miscarriages

Some view miscarriages as a bad thing, personally, I think they are just God answering my prayers. I owe that guy big time..

Threat

Alright, before I start, I just want you all to know that for every joke you do not laugh at, I will take off an article of clothing... Yeah, let's be honest. You don't want that and I know you don't want that, so let's work together as a team to prevent that from happening.